


it would have been

by hwiyoung



Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, M/M, but like kind of happy ending?????, i feel like the characterisation is dodgy, um kind of angst???????
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-04-29
Updated: 2017-04-29
Packaged: 2018-10-25 10:42:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10762629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hwiyoung/pseuds/hwiyoung
Summary: Inseong believes in soulmates and happily ever afters.





	it would have been

**Author's Note:**

> i don't know if the title really correlates well with the story but it's the day6 song i was listening to on repeat while writing this. highkey inspired by one of the prompts from [here](http://silentpeaches.tumblr.com/post/125291322610/soulmate-au-story-ideas), [this](https://archiveofourown.org/works/10726815?view_adult=true) work, and [this](http://foxyins.tumblr.com/post/160085927419/a-swag-couple-in-sf9) gifset.

_343_

 

Inseong fiddles with the golden pendant that lies around his neck. He doesn’t need to look at it to know the number currently inscribed in the middle.

Three hundred and forty three days before he meets his fate, the person that destiny has chosen for him.

It’s the only system Inseong has believed and trusted in. It’s the only system he knows.

After all, his parents are soulmates. All the couples in his neighbourhoods are soulmates. Even his younger sister, Seolhyun, has met her soulmate. (He’s not bitter, just a little disappointed and impatient that she got hers first, but he knows better than to test fate. It happens when it happens.) They all have their happily ever afters.

His soulmate will be perfect for him. The other part he’d never realised he was missing. They would complete each other, two parts becoming a whole. Someone _not_ being with their soulmate isn’t even an idea that anyone he’s met has considered.

He just needs to wait for another 343 days.

Today he’s reminded of how difficult it feels sometimes, when he walks into Sensational First, and Youngbin and Seokwoo are already seated opposite to each other. His stomach churns a little and he tries to shove the uncomfortable feeling back down into its corner.

He’s surprised to see an unfamiliar guy sitting next to Youngbin. Their little trio isn’t exactly exclusive, but there isn’t usually an extra person during their cafe meetups.

Youngbin calls his name and waves him over (with the most disgustingly lovestruck smile on his face – an effect of Seokwoo, no doubt). As Inseong approaches, he spots Youngbin’s other hand in his soulmate’s, and to no one's surprise, their fingers are intertwined. Warmth blooms in his heart when he thinks about how happy they are, and how happy _he_ is that two of his closest friends are happy with each other. He can’t help the smile that stretches across his lips when he remembers how fate had given him just a tiny role to play in the two of them meeting.

“This is Baek Juho!” Youngbin says, as Inseong takes a seat. “He’s in my music course. He’s new in the area and doesn’t know too many people, so I thought we could help him feel welcome.”

“Of course.”

The guy turns to look at him, and Inseong can’t help but immediately focus on his nose. It’s something different from the ordinary, not a bad-weird, but definitely unique. Inseong likes unique. Juho’s first expression looks kind of cold and unfriendly, despite the pinkish hair that rests on top of his head. Not really the kind of person that he’d approach, let alone strike up a conversation with.

But then Juho smiles and he has a thought of, _oh_.

Inseong’s taken aback by the way it lights up Juho’s face and it honestly makes him look so _sweet_. He tries to match it with his own friendly smile, though it doesn’t quite match the radiance of the pink-haired boy’s.

“It’s nice to meet you, Inseong.” And his voice is _deep_ . “Youngbin and Seokwoo have told me a lot about you.” And Juho’s potentially heard a lot of _embarrassing_ things about him.

“Nice to meet you too, Juho. They haven’t told me anything about you so…”

Juho leans back into his chair and laughs, and Inseong can’t help but grin in response. He grabs a menu and opens it, ducking his head to look down into the menu. It doesn’t do much to hide his slowly reddening cheeks from Seokwoo’s keen eyes though.

There’s 343 days before he meets the soulmate he’s been waiting more than 23 years for, so he doesn’t know why he’s suddenly so captivated by Baek Juho.

 

 

_325_

 

**from: swag nose**

[05:13AM] _have you heard rap monster’s mixtape???_

[05:13AM] _also there’s this song i think you’d like_

[05:14AM] [ _https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xfSh1ILiN4_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0xfSh1ILiN4) 

 

  
  
_312_

 

Inseong’s hunched over one of the library desks, slaving away at his coursework when he hears the voice.

“Hey, I didn’t expect you to be here. I thought you were at home today.”

He lifts his head up, and tilts his head to the left. A shy smile makes its way onto his face. “Hi Juho.”

“Do you mind if I sit?”

Inseong shakes his head no, and the other happily plops himself down into the seat opposite him. He props one arm onto the table and rests his chin on his hand, watching silently as Juho settles himself. As he’s pulling out his laptop and some pen and manuscript, they make eye contact, and Inseong can’t stop the smile that crinkles the corners of his eyes. Juho giggles. (It’s still a weird experience for Inseong because Juho has the look of an intimidating bad boy who’d beat someone up if they even glanced at him oddly. Not someone who wears pastel pink jumpers and giggles.)

His heart leaps into his throat and he chokes up at how oddly domestic the small moment feels.

Inseong’s not sure how he’s suddenly gotten used to Juho, as if he can’t remember how he lived without the younger’s presence a little over a month ago. He’d somehow slotted himself well into Inseong’s routine, as well as their group of friends. They’d been meeting up since they were introduced, first with Youngbin and Seokwoo, and then without them. When it was just the two of them, it was almost like they were going on dates, really, because they’d take turns paying for each other’s coffee.

Inseong doesn’t know how to feel about it. His real soulmate is waiting for him out there somewhere, and here _he_ is, mooning over some guy he’d met recently. He doesn’t even know if Juho’s…

“Hey Juho-” Inseong halts. He’s suddenly rethinking about how appropriate asking the question would be.

Juho squints at him inquisitively. “Yeah?”

His voice wavers when he asks, “Have you met your soulmate?”

Juho doesn’t meet Inseong’s eyes, nor does he say anything for a moment. Then, he shakes his head and looks off to his left when he says, “I don’t believe in it.”

“Don’t,” Inseong pauses, trying to process the foreign concept in his mind “believe?”

“This system. It’s flawed.”

There’s a wry smile on his face, and Inseong frowns. He wants to question him, prod further and understand _why the heck_ Juho just said that. But the younger is focused intently on his computer screen and Inseong takes it as his cue to drop the subject.

 

 

_299_

 

**from: swag nose**

[08:37AM] _are you coming to the library today?_

[08:48AM] _ok_

[08:52AM] _did you eat breakfast?_

[08:53AM] _i got your coffee_

[08:56AM] _i’m sitting at our table_

 

  
  
_283_

 

“Inseong, can you please help me with English?”

Inseong sips his coffee as Chanhee looks pleadingly at him across the table. “Why can’t you ask Seokwoo or Youngbin?”

The youngest in their friend group rolls his eyes like it’s the most obvious answer in the world. “Because you’re my favourite and they’re bad at English.”

He tries to contain his snort. “I’m your favourite today because I can help you with your schoolwork. You know they love you the most, right?”

“Of course.” Chanhee nods, and then smiles cheekily. “But it doesn’t change the fact that they’re not the ones who can speak English.”

“I suppose so.” He hides his amusement by taking a bite of the muffin sitting on the plate in front of him. “But how have you been? Is high school going okay?”

Chanhee immediately straightens up and nods enthusiastically, his eyes crinkling as a grin takes over his face. He suddenly seems a lot younger, like the age he’s supposed to _be_. Inseong’s not sure why but it fills him with relief. Sometimes it feels to him like Chanhee’s a lot older, a lot more mature, than the people his age.

“It’s good. I didn’t think I’d like it as much as I do now. My pendant says there’s four days left, so I’m wondering if my soulmate goes to my school or something.”

Inseong’s eyebrows shoot up in surprise. “Already? You’re only sixteen, aren’t you?”

The other male’s grin only widens.

 

  
  
_280_

 

**from: swag nose**

[01:02AM] _inseong_

[01:04AM] _i lov u so muhc_

[01:07AM] _i jknow ive known u for like tow months_

[01:07AM] _i cant imagine life without u_

[01:10AM] _i wish you could see_

[01:11AM] _how much_

[11:03AM] _please disregard my 1am texts_

[11:05AM] _also i don’t think i can go to the library today_

 

  
  
_279_

 

Inseong isn’t sure what could be so urgent that Youngbin’s left 14 missed calls and 12 messages on his phone.

 

**from: (trash)binnie**

[10:09am] _inseong_

[10:09am] _bRO_

[10:10am] _answer ur phone_

[10:10am] _it’s urgent_

[10:13am] _pick uP_

[10:13am] _what r u doin rn???_

[10:14am] _are u studying_

[10:14am] _lol_

[10:14am] _ur a nerd_

[10:17am] _STOP_

[10:17am] _HURRY UP_

[10:21am] _it’s about chanhee_

 

It’s half past ten when he calls Youngbin back.

“What’s up?”

“Can you come to Sensational First?”

There’s something off about Youngbin’s voice that has Inseong feeling like there’s something very, very _wrong_. He holds his phone between his shoulder and his ear while his hands shove his belongings into his bag.

“I’m on my way.”

By the time he pushes open the familiar door, the bell tinkles, though it doesn’t feel like a happy arrival. Rather, it’s almost eerily quiet. Maybe it’s because the rush is in the early mornings and late afternoons, and Inseong’s never really been here at these hours.

He spots his friends in the back corner, and makes his way over.

They’re at a round table, and Chanhee’s sitting in the middle of a Seokwoo and Youngbin sandwich. Sanghyuk, Taeyang and Jaeyoon take up the rest of the seats, and Hwiyoung’s standing behind Chanhee. Inseong finds his place next to Juho, whose arm somehow finds its way around his waist. (It’s not unwelcome, nor is it the first time.)

If he remembers right, today’s the day Chanhee meets his soulmate. He should be beaming, shining like the sun. All of them should be celebrating. He shouldn’t even be here, he should be with whoever his destined partner is right now.

But instead, the youngest’s face is drawn and closed. His lips are closed in a tight line and his eyes are squeezed shut. Chanhee isn’t really the crybaby of the group (Hwiyoung is, usually), but he looks like he’s trying to hold back tears.

“They broke it on the day we were supposed to meet.”

That’s when Inseong notices the large crack in the middle of Chanhee’s pendant.

_What the-_

Chanhee looks so utterly defeated and disbelieving. Inseong’s heart cracks and bleeds for the baby of their group. It hurts so painfully, because he’d seen the enthusiasm and anticipation, and he kind of wants to cry because Chanhee doesn’t _deserve_ this.

“They don’t want me.”

His head turns and he makes brief eye contact with Juho, and the other’s eyes say everything.

_The system is flawed._

 

  
  
_274_

 

“Go out with me.”

Inseong nearly drops the coffee cup he’s clutching.

“Um?”

Juho points to Inseong, and then at himself, while repeating his words. “Go out with me.”

There’s 286 days until he meets his soulmate but he still says yes to Juho.

(Later Juho tells him that maybe he sounded cool and all, but he initially had something more romantic planned and he’s a tiny bit pouty that he didn’t get to execute it.)

 

  
  
_267_

 

Inseong is content to stay like this, resting his head on Juho’s shoulder with the other man’s arms wrapped protectively around his shoulder.

“Juho,” is what Inseong mumbles this cold, rainy morning. “Why don’t you believe?”

The fingers that are playing his hair suddenly slow down, until the hand is removed completely from his head. He makes a small noise of dissatisfaction, and Juho hums in reply.

“Well, why do you believe?”

Inseong looks down at the golden pendant hanging around his neck. Suddenly looking at it, here, makes it feel so much more heavier.

A burden.

A reminder that there’s someone out there who’s his true soulmate

A reminder that there’s someone out there who’s _Juho’s_ true soulmate.

267 days.

He wonders how many days on Juho’s pendant.

“Why else would we have the pendants? The countdowns?”

Even he thinks he voice sounds weak, doubtful. He grasps Juho’s hand tighter, like it’s an anchor that promises to keep him grounded.

“But then why have them when they can be broken?”

 

  
  
_247_

 

**from: swag nose**

[12:43AM] _i meant it that day when i was drunk_

[12:44AM] _but i just wanted to tell you i love you_

[12:44AM] _sleep well, angel_

 

  
  
_243_

 

Sensational First cafe is as warm and homely as ever. The nine of them are seated at a round table meant for six, but they manage like they always do, with the youngest two squishing together on one chair, and Seokwoo and Inseong on Youngbin and Juho’s laps respectively.

(It has to be some kind of record though, if a 190cm tall giant can fit on someone’s lap.)

They try to steer away from talking about soulmates, especially for Chanhee, even though it’s already been a month. It’s been hard for the youngest of their group, and Seokwoo’s said he’s seen him still holding onto it at least twice, looking like he’s about to cry.

But it suddenly makes Inseong think because he realises though he’s thought about it a lot, he’s never actually seen the numbers on Juho’s pendant, let alone talked about it with him. Juho’s has never been super secretive about it, but it’d just never been a topic of actual discussion. It seems awkward to bring up.

It’s a thought that flits through his mind as they’re talking about Youngbin and Juho’s music studies, and asking Inseong how he’s going with studying to be a teacher.

When they go back to Juho’s apartment later that day, there’s one moment when he actually gets a peek and-

19.

Juho’s slated to meet his true soulmate in 19 days.

 

  
  
_233_

 

**from: swag nose**

[02:24AM] _do i love you??_

[02:24AM] _of course i do_

[02:26AM] _yes i’m sure_

[02:26AM] _why are you suddenly asking?_

[02:28AM] _ok sleep tight_

[02:29AM] _i love you_

 

All he can think is, _will you still love me when you meet your soulmate?_

He’s never once considered there’s an unlisted option in the system, that he doesn’t have to follow the rules.

It hurts to think that he could lose Juho.

Even if he’s in love with Juho, his soulmate is still the other half of his whole.

His happily ever after.

Call him a hopeless romantic, if you want.

 

  
  
_228_

 

It’s the loud crash that wakes Inseong up.

Juho’s not there but he’s pretty sure he can hear the younger man in his studio doing something or other, so he falls back asleep.

The second time he wakes up, he’s in Juho’s arms, but more importantly-

He realises Juho’s pendant is no longer around his neck.

 

  
  
_227_

 

Inseong finds the pendant the next day, early in the morning.

It’s smashed on the ground, swept under the desk in Juho’s studio. There are cracks in the place of intricate designs and engravings. Maybe if he squints, he’d be able to make out a nine.

He doesn’t know what to think anymore.

 

  
  
_225_

 

“Why did you do it?”

“Why did I what?”

“Break your pendant.”

“...”

“Juho-”

“ _Inseong_ , why do you still believe in the system?”

Inseong doesn’t trust his answer not to sound uncertain.

 

 

_222_

 

They haven’t talked at all in three days.

Inseong’s mostly been going to the library, but he’s been avoiding the corner window table on the third floor. _Their_ table.

He sounds like a nerd, for finding the library his safe haven. At least it gives him space to think, unlike the cafe, full of noisy patrons, Jaeyoon the cashier who’ll take your order with the biggest attitude, and Seokwoo, ever the mother figure of their friend group.

 

**from: sockwoot**

[11:52AM] _inSEONG_

[11:53AM] _u and juho literally havent talked for 3 days_

[11:54AM] _im done with being the middle guy so please just talk and make up_

[12:02PM] _wAIT HE WHAT_

[12:10PM] _so are you going to break yours for him or???_

 

 

_220_

 

It takes two days of gathering his own courage to be where he’s standing now.

Staring down at the cracked pendant.

Inseong feels like he should be feeling something more than this, like his heart ripping apart, or some kind of new revelation.

His soulmate’s pendant will have cracked, wherever they are.

There’s 220 days until Inseong was supposed to meet his soulmate.

 

 

_220_

 

"You know you didn’t have to break it for me,” is what Juho whispers. “I know how much it actually meant to you.”

Inseong doesn’t have a verbal answer, but he wraps his arms around Juho and pulls him even closer.

 

 

 

There’s 217 days before Inseong was supposed to meet the soulmate he’d been waiting more than 23 years for.

But he knows he’d give them up each time for Baek Juho.

**Author's Note:**

> this is 10/10 a mess but it's currently 3am and haha yeah i couldn't sleep until i finished this (aka the longest fic i've ever written so far) so here u go, the juseong that noone asked for. (i might come back and edit or add a bit when i'm more coherent ;-;)
> 
> hmu on @99hwis on twitter (pls teach me how to use this website) or tumblr


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